I gt a mothefucker.
Get real.
Ure pissin evry1 off mom.
All of us get irritated easily juz by listenin 2 ur voice.
so stop blaming everyone else except 4 urself.
im sick & tired of both of u abusing me in different ways.
u guys imprve a little bit after i start makin trble in de sch.
no more scars & bruises 2 sch.datz wadd im hopin 4 dis yr.
coz nxt yr.ill b gone.
but still,u guys r tearing me in2 pieces.
im sick of u pretendin 2 tc of me by talkin big infrnt of ppl.
well ive been ure ragdoll for 5 yrs.
i prefer u in de prison daddy.
u cant ever plc me in de gals hme.get dis in ur fuckin head.
watch it.i knw ull b officially divorced by de tyme she turns 8.mayb 10.
im more powerful than u,mom.dont b suprised if im bettr than u one day
im still hoping as long as i believe in Allah.
!st hope destroyed:of finding my real mom.>>mayb she juz lost me u knw,,by accident.ha.
truthh:she doesnt even want you in de 1st plc.
2nd hope destroyed:do i hav a daddy?!
truthh:he's been in prison.
3rd hope:finally 2gether in de same hse wen i turn 12.
truthh:till my parents start thrwin things& get beaten up by each othr.WTF?
4th hope:dey prefer de last child alwaes.which was my bro.
truthh:& nw itz my sis.
5th hope:mayb mum will b hapy 1nce she gets another baby,,,,(few yrs bck)
truthh:hopes 2 high .den miscarrriiigeee. 4 my another 2 siblings.
do i regret my bday wish of havin dis babysis 4 u?
my prayers r often heard mom.ask urself y.
u begged me 4 her.&miracles do happen wen i pray hard.
u never appreciated.u never change.u went bck 2 ur old self.
both of u stopd me frm visitin de dctor @ least 4 times a wk wen i was yg.
juz bcoz u dnt wanna waste $ on me.
god damn it i gt a fuckin rich parents.
but do dey knw hw fuckin selfish u guys r?
i juz paid mom 4oo bucks 4 my food.
still owe her another 200.im so stressed up.
i bought my own sch bag juz nw:D
juz bcoz i skipped all those checkups lasttyme...
nw my condition is gettin wrse.
mom.u heard de dctr dat im de kind of ppl hu dont last.
wad did u do?
u stp me frm goin 2 de dctr.
nw im payin 4 my daily treatment.
@least 200 a wk.
u dnt evn knw ive been visitin private dctrs mom.
as if u care.
wad if i decided 2 try de hospital?
dey wont let me step out again.& hus r my parents again?
i hv no idea.
i look happy on fb dont i,guys?
gotta hide& secure all ur pain.
i lovee my bf soo muchh.sad thing he dont caree too.
Once he said i talk rubbish.& dat i gt no feelings.we havent evn met @ dat pt of tyme.
i hate ppl judgin me w/o knowin anytin.
den he said wadeva i tld hym was unbelievable.dis was ytd nite.
so he doesnt believe in wadeva i told hym.
den juz nw he smsed me dat he dont trust me juz bcoz i didnt get de chance 2 reply hym.
i tld hym b4 i cant use my fon infront of my parents.
nxt thing i knw....he'll tell me dat he dont love me anymore.
i smoke last nite.
he dk hw much his words cut thru me.
i cried ytd nite N slept 4 3hrs.b4 goin 2 my workplace,office and sme shoppin spree dis mornin.
im not suprised loves,wen he tld me he'll b goin bck hme 4 awile wen new yr arrives.
he tld me last wk dat he aint gonna leave s'pore.
der was a reason y i kept askin hym if he's plannin 2 ever leave dis country...even 4 a shrt period of tyme.
& dat i beggd hym not 2 leave dis country...not to leave me.ever.
i knew dis was comin.
and wadeva it is...it still hurts wen he tld me dat.
i cant stand the thought of hym being dis far...let alone DAT FAR.
but itz alryte.
Itz ok dat he dnt trust/believe in me.
coz I DO TRUST HYM.
I DO BELIEVE IN HYM.
I DO CARE 4 HYM.
I DO LOVE HYM.
SO MUCHH.